Living apart together

Sociologists, they say, are stumped when it comes to explaining where this "new" quasi-marriage phenomenon is getting its head of steam. They suspect it's fear of divorce or a reluctance to "give wholly of oneself" or some such. Far be it from me to criticize the people who think they know better--nah, it's not that far from me--but I have some ideas.

In case you're not up to speed, "LAT" is where a couple acts like a couple, pooling some finances, even not seeing other people, but maintaining separate domiciles.

First, I think it's just a new spin on the old common law marriage. Once upon a time, if people just started living together, after a while folks assumed they were married. One good thing that's come out of the commercialization of our culture is the fact that there are different kinds of partnerships, and it doesn't have to be a traditional, or at least live-in, marriage, to be legit. If two people can live together, even start a family, and not share anything except what they've literally brought to the house, why not the other way around? If two people of the same sex can marry--the laws will catch up soon enough--and any two married people can not have kids, then the whole "starting a family" isn't actually important.

Subsequently, I think it's a natural outgrowth of committed relationships that would be on the cusp of shifting into the common-law-marriage gear. Two people spend a lot of time together, start seeing other people a little less often, maybe start spending the night both at one place or the other more often...after a while it should become clear that there's some potential for long-term commitment. We do need our space, though, sometimes. It takes a while to really cement things, especially in this day and age when we've finally come to appreciate how important self-actualization and autonomy are.

It makes sense to start by "welding" finances before going on to more personal things. Sure, lifestyle is pretty personal, but by this time in a relationship, that bridge is already built. Why not continue with something that's less emotion laden, albeit still important? If you start fighting then, you can still go "back to your corners" to let cooler heads prevail. People get so clouded by romance, or they willfully blind themselves with principles about lasting marriage, and they go in and it's all shock and misery and toil. They have enough work to do during the day! Let them stay on the permanent-boyfriend/girlfriend track and take things past there one step at a time. If a relationship's meant to last for a while, then there's no rush.

The diabolical shoes were a giveaway

I saw a preview for a movie today that made me smile a little. It's called "The Devil Wears Prada." It's ostensibly about a difficult woman who runs a fashion magazine, but I couldn't help thinking of the little ears all over that pricked up when news that the pope wears Prada too. I hope other people make the connection. Hopefully with more subtle associations like this one. It doesn't take much to get a little truth about Babylon-Rome and its "emperor" under people's radar to give them a nudge towards a grassroots effort to push popery to the side and out of this country.

Just Look at him. I'm not superstitious like them but I think those red shoes are a red flag to us. They obviously don't go with that robe thing or his hat. An organization that big and powerful doesn't make little mistakes like this one. Well, it's not so little a mistake, I think. I think it was the Spirit who motivated him to get such indulgently expensive shows (isn't indulgence a sin?) to remind us in the modern world how misled he is, and to get ones that were red, to remind us of the color of the flames that will be licking at his soul for eternity, and of the skin of the one who rules down there.

I shouldn't be so angry, but to smugly think he can get away with such posh accessories because the world's too dumb is just typical and I'm annoyed with it. I'm not interested in seeing anything catholic at all. Even look at my name. I was named for my grandmother, who never took a sacrament a Sunday in her life, but she was Italian, and that's too close to home. Ever since I found my Lord after high school, I've gone by Jean just to distance myself.

Maybe I'll see this movie twice.